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Is a child frightened of seeing the other parent suffering parental alienation?

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Some of the resistance to being willing to recognise parental alienation in a child, or in an adult, is because it can be abused. Certainly it can, just as legislation, particularly when called “gendered violence” is often misused. But misuse by some people should never blind us to the real problems being suffered by others.

“Frightened children are not alienated children”

Is correct in that not all – perhaps not even half – of children frightened of seeing a non-resident parent have their fear because of deliberate parental alienation.

However, it is also the case that not all frightened children are not alienated children. Or to put that more easily, some frightened children are alienated children.

Unfortunately, the resident parent is often carrying negative emotions towards the person they once loved (or in some way, might still love). Even without meaning to alienate a child, such a parent can inadvertently reinforce any negative feelings a child might have towards the other parent. And it is a rare child who has no negative feelings at all about each parent!

So the person least in position to judge whether parental alienation is going on is the one the child resides with. Or is currently visiting with. The sad part is that unless parents actively work against parental alienation, they are probably both contributing to it, with the parent the child spends most time with inevitably having most influence.

One comment on “Is a child frightened of seeing the other parent suffering parental alienation?

Oh, it’s not “inadvertently”. We all know we’re talking about women here and that their hatred is more important to them that their children. Men will usually speak well of the mother around the children, no matter what.

The mother is either putting down the father to/around their children or she’s not and let’s not pretend they don’t know which. Especially when it’s happening over and over again, for years. What they keep saying is a conscious choice.

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